When someone is a single person, finding senior care is a much different story than when care is needed for both individuals in a couple. As Americans are living longer lives, this is becoming more of an issue. Being prepared to handle it on our end is important, but because it is not a common problem, many people out there are unsure of how to proceed.
The first step is just being aware.
There is often a sense that a couple must support each other. While this is a great ideal to live toward, it isn’t always realistic. One of the goals of marriage, and something that is stated in many wedding vow variations around the world, is that each person in the marriage will look out and help the other when they can’t take care of themselves.
There are many factors that can prevent this from happening, though. Dementia or Alzheimer’s disease might be an issue for your dad, while your mom struggles with some sort of physical disability, or vice versa. Your mom might be confined to a wheelchair, and your dad might not be able to help her get around the house like he once was able to. Or, there might just be too much to be done around the house for both of your parents to handle. There are a whole host of other issues that families deal with–these are just a handful that come to mind.
Whatever the situation, it needs to be acknowledged sooner rather than later that the aging process takes a toll on couples as well as individuals. It can’t just be assumed that because people are together that they are able to care for themselves and one another. This is where family steps in. As the primary decision maker in the family, it’s important that you know what your parents are struggling with. It’s also important that you know what steps can be taken to help them out. Some helpful moves can be very gradual, such as introducing them to an in-home care service where a caregiver might be able to come once or twice a week to help them out around the house. Other moves might be more intensive. It really needs to be handled based upon the specific circumstances of your family members.
It’s also important to remember that your mom and dad will not want to be separated. This might become an issue if one of your parents needs a different type of care than the other. For example, if your dad had a stroke and needed to move into a skilled nursing facility for an extended amount of time, where would your mom be during that time? This is a tough situation to face, but it is becoming a reality for more people as life expectancy goes up. People living longer lives is a good thing, but it creates a new set of needs when it comes to senior care. Being aware of those needs before your situation becomes a crisis is a good way to always ensure that your family is getting the best care possible.
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